Realistic

I've dreamed of doing what was done in "The Good Ol' Summertime"... and falling in love through letters (or email). "You've Got Mail" is a remake of that movie... you knew that, right? Anyway...I am nothing if not romantic. But I think I have a very good sense of self, so I'm not completely naive, with no sense of what's going on around me. I make my own sense out of things... to me, this is much more sincere then when I try to copy the majority. This is why, the whole dating thing has never appealed to me: Just a bunch of nerves in a bundle...not sure of where he's taking me, or how I should dress, or what I should say... Do I let him come in afterwards or not?

Besides, a long time ago, I was in a relationship where we were head over heels for each other and we were together all the time, and we were alone... too much. We were always way too close to compromising each other... and thank you Lord that this never happened, because we did not make it. He would have taken my essence with him forever...something that I have reserved for only one man. Why would I date? It's like lighting a match, and inching your way closer and closer to the flame while praying like made that you don't get burned. Anyway, so many things to remember, things at which I am not socially adept. How far is too far? Should I have said that? Does he wanna kiss me? Do I wanna kiss him?(??). This place is too loud, I need to get outta here. Will I offend him? What if I start getting a migraine? Good grief! I'm exhausted already!

I really, really do want to be in a relationship with the right guy. I've heard all sorts of songs about looking into someone's soul... and I'm all for it. I hate small talk because it,s... small. It's annoying. I know that sometimes it's the only thing that starts two people "talking"... but I don't lack interesting conversation. What I want is not temporary. I'm looking for someone who desires marriage like I do. But obviously, I need to get to know this person first, without too much physical desire ruining it..,so, let's write to each other! You tell me what you're like... And I'll do the same. Pictures? Absolutely! Blogs? Awesome! You Tube videos? Sure. (But at the moment, I can't make any, so... I want something from days gone by... a courtship... not just a date. I'm not afraid of distance... but I know that many, it's a turn off. This is why, I think the writing would work because we can get out of our comfort zones without leaving our sofa's. (Don't worry... We'll see each other eventually...it will work itself out.). This would literally force us to behave ourselves, and love the times that we do see each other that much more.

"This would not work," you say. It is not for everyone. I am old fashioned... It is official. What doesn't work for me, is dating for the sake of dating. What also does not work is jumping from person to person... broken hearts and having to pick yourself up off the floor again and again. This is a perfectly socially acceptable process, but I can do without it. All the talk in the world about hooking up or being friend's with benefits, or being just friend's afterwords does nothing for me. TV never shows us the women who become pregnant, and the children who come unwanted, and the hearts torn apart by abortion, and the birth control that fails, and the broken hearts, and a loss of honor and respect for that which is sacred and must be earned... not given away at random. Extraordinary results require extraordinary measures. This idea has been mine for sometimes, but if you need proof that it's possible, look up Rebecca Park Totilo., and a series called "The Bride of Christ: The Jewish wedding Customs.". I believe in part 4, she discusses her own "meeting" her husband. By the way, I've tried EHarmony. I don't recommend it...it sucked! I tried Christian Mingle, and they were wonderful. A lot of possibilities came of it, but I am today, still single. I want a best friend... and then I wanna marry him! :). Is this realistic?