I've been told before that maybe I can't live with anybody... because "some people just can't." If this is so true, than why do I want to get married so badly? I've tried to go backwards, and say "Well, if I'm supposed to be single..." I know that if I were to be single the rest of my life, I could... God would give me the grace to do that. But I really feel that entertaining this idea anymore is now an insult in God's ears because He's made it clear to me that he has someone for me... it's just a matter of when. But marriage is becomming what we aren't for the benefit of someone else (to a degree). How does one do that? How do you surrender yourself for the sake of someone else? If I can't live with anybody day to day... how do I ever expect to be married?
Inseure about what others think of me. I think women are afraid to get married because they've been hurt by men, belittled.... so they get defensive. I think men are afraid to get married because women are defensixe. They're agressive because they're tired of the wrong men making them feel worthless. Not all men are this way. I've known too many sweet, wonderful, sensative, Godly men to think otherwise. However, sometimes, out of sheer frustration, I find myself giving in to the myth that all the right kind of guys are either already married, or they're not into girls.
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord.
Plans for good and not for evil,
to give you a future and a hope. Jer. 29:11
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